Nothing Gold Can Stay

    Nature’s first green is gold, Her hardest hue to hold. Her early leaf’s a flower; But only so an hour. Then leaf subsides to leaf. So Eden sank to grief, So dawn goes down to day. Nothing gold can stay. By Robert Frost ____________________________________________________________________________ Skylar loved the movie[…]

Christmas with my angel

  “Fear not for I am with you; be not dismayed for I am your God. I will strengthen you.” Isaiah 41:10 Boy did I need this verse today. Every day is torturous without Skylar, and I was prepared for today to not be any different. I was wrong. Today[…]

Merry Christmas Girls….

  I’ve sat down a few times within the last few days to write in my blog and I just couldn’t find the words. I had a pretty rough weekend with my sadness and pain, it’s strange how there are moments of peace, and life seems “ok” if only for[…]


I I sat down in these wee hours thinking I was going to write about one thing and as I sat here and let my thoughts sort themselves out, I learned real quick that God was pushing me in a different direction. I’ve read a lot on forgiveness lately and[…]

and the greatest of these is Love…..

_____________________________________________________________________________ walk by Faith…..have Hope always…Love others I wasn’t going to post anything this evening ( I suppose it’s early morning now) but I sat down at my computer, I pulled this verse out of a prayer jar that some friends made for me. This is one of my most[…]

To my Skylar,

My sweet Sky, it’s been another one of those days. Today I have been haunted by the men who came to our door on the morning you died…….I can’t get the things they said to me out of my head. I can’t quit thinking about how I felt when I[…]

We need you God

“We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not despairing; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed.”  2 Corinthians 4:8-9 I have had such a wave of emotions today that I don’t even know where to begin. My day began as usual, with thoughts of Skylar[…]


2 Corinthians 4:16-18 –  Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what[…]

One Step at a Time

I read an interesting article last night that a friend recommended to me titled “When a Child Dies”.  Much of the article mentioned things I’ve read before but there were a few points that hit home for me. The author talks of tears being like balm to the grieving heart.[…]


Wow! As I type this I am shaking. When I was writing my earlier post I was talking to Skylar and begging her for a sign. It’s not something I would typically type and tell you all about as I like to keep my talks with Skylar to myself, even[…]

How do I say goodbye?

I’ve had so many thoughts in the last few days on how I say goodbye to my firstborn child. I know it’s not truly goodbye, but in this lifetime it is.  How do I say goodbye to a child that wasn’t sick, wasn’t suffering and who had so much more[…]

In my arms where you belong

  I feel I am failing all of you as I have no strength to share lately. 36 days later and I am in a darker place now than ever before.  Today has been an incredibly difficult day and the feeling of emptiness for my Sky-bird has overcome me with[…]

3 Crosses

Well my sweet child, we placed 3 crosses for 3 beautiful girls today at the crash site. I’m so happy  there is a daily reminder to everyone that passes, just how short and precious life is……I just wish it wasn’t my baby girl (and Soph and Juls) that had to[…]

Prayers for my Alexyss Raine

I sat down this evening….or I guess it is now morning…..thinking I was going to write about how bittersweet my day was Christmas shopping , knowing there were no gifts to be bought for Skylar this year; no long list from her of books and movies she wanted and shoes[…]

My Worst Nightmare

On November 1st, just 3 short days before the accident that claimed the life of not only my sweet Skylar, but also 2 other angels…..Sky and I discussed my fears via text, which we often did.  Skylar was indeed wearing her seat belt on the night that she died, but[…]

31 days without you

  The stockings are hung  By the chimney with care In hopes that when I wake You will be there. Words are inadequate today. My heart is so full of pain and sadness. I fear I will never be whole again. I fear Lexy, Caden and Ashton will suffer….they have[…]

3 Angels

  The image above represents our new reality. Today I’m at a place where I don’t know whether to rejoice that these 3 beautiful girls are with their heavenly Father and enjoying eternity…..or to scream with madness that they were ripped away from us way too soon; never to turn[…]

A Mother’s Love

I’ve been reading some on grief and trying to understand the stages that everyone speaks of. I’m learning that losing a child to something such as a car accident (unanticipated death) has affects such as PTSD; and the death notification plays into that as well.  I never would have thought[…]

Christmas with Jesus

For the first time since you were born I put up my Christmas tree without any help from you.. even last year as a busy teenager you took time out of your evening and helped me hang ornaments. This year Joy and Alana and I worked on the tree (while[…]