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The Last Ride

Posted on February 26, 2015

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My heart has been heavy these past few weeks thinking of the girls last day on this earth. Many times the thoughts that flood my mind are not something I can control; but I am learning that most of these images are part of the grieving process and in order for me to properly grieve, I need to let them seep in and at times even allow them consume me. I need to feel and I need to be real with myself and know that the pain will always be there, nothing will ever change that.

It’s easy to allow the mind to take you to all of the dark places of grief, especially in a tragedy as massive as this.  I am slowly learning that Sky would not want that of me. She would ONLY want me to remember her with a smile.

I pass the crash site twice a day, every day, on my way to work, and there isn’t a time that I don’t think of their last few minutes. I wonder what they were doing, what they were thinking, if they were singing, if they were texting…….I simply wonder. In my mind I refer to it as “their last ride”…… carefree and no doubt laughing and carrying on.

To know these 3 girls, was to love them. It seems cliche because they are gone so of course everyone professes their love for them…but it was different with them. I had the pleasure that so many will never get… I knew them and I loved them. I admire all 3 for being strong teenage girls in a time when being strong isn’t so easy.

Their last ride makes me ponder my own death and my own legacy. What will people say about my last ride? What will they say about yours?

Becoming a mother made me strive to be the best that I could be for my children…..losing part of my heart and soul makes me strive to be the best I can be for others. For those hurting….for those drowning in their grief and pain…for those who don’t think they can go on…..for those that think no one else gets it.

I hope someday people look back at my last ride and smile.

I know our angels took their last ride straight to the top.

 

This has become one my most favorite quotes:

“The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.” – Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

 

We have two upcoming fundraisers for Sky’s Scholarship Fund: Save The Dates!

April 11, 2015 – 7:30pm – 2:00am — Fundraiser and 19th Birthday Party Celebration 

Join us at Soft Rock Cafe in Centerville  (21 & up) for live music, raffle prizes and more!

 

August 2, 2015 8:30am – 2nd annual 5K Memorial Run (starts & ends at Bellcreek Elementary in Bellbrook)

Link to register online: >> http://SkysTheLimitMemorial5K.itsyourrace.com/

If you want to mail in a paper copy please visit site below and print off paper registration: 

http://www.keysports.net/#!2nd-Annual-Skys-The-Limit-Memorial-5K/cra1/i6jv96bh29

 

7 Comments

  1. You are absolutely a wonderful, beautiful, strong woman. And you really do inspire people. You have helped me deal with my own grief of losing my dad. But losing a child is different I know and I could not imagine. This post hit home for me. Thank you and I love you girl.

  2. Hi Kelli,

    I was never quite sure how to reach out to you…but I wanted to share my story with you. On May 8th, 2015 I went for a drive with my two friends. We’ve always driven around together, aimlessly cruising, and searching for fun things to do. Ever since I heard the story of Skylar and her friends s I’ve worn my seat belt in every car I get into without a second thought. However, it was a different story for my two friends, who I guess liked to live more dangerously than I did. I’ve reminded them in the past to put their seat belts on too, but it was usually blown off by them “Pft, we’re just going down the street!” or “we’ll take our chances.”

    On May 8th, we packed up for a trip to a friend’s house. My girlfriends and I had planned this trip for a week and were more than excited to go on it. As we settled into the car, your daughter came to mind. I watched as Jen surfed her phone for music and Amy play her pretend drum set at the wheel before taking off. A sudden urge came over me and I pleaded with them to wear seat belts. I kicked and fussed from the back and refused to go on the trip if they didn’t buckle up. Now, I am not usually like this. I am a fairly passive person, so this made my girls concerned but also slightly annoyed. After a few sighs and groans, they put on their seat belts.

    While on the road, another sedan swiped us from the right side. My friends and I received several broken bones and a completely totaled car. It was an experience I will never forget and has completely changed my life. I do not know when I will be able to play volleyball again and if I will play as well as I used to. One of my friends is afraid to drive now and the other makes sure to wear her seat belt every time we enter a car. The officer we spoke to expressed to us that we made a great escape after the damage done in the car. “Had you not worn your seat belts…” he explained in detail. My stomach turned.

    The image of your daughter impacted my decision to annoy the hell out of my friends that day. I live across the country from your family, yet feel touched in the greatest way. I am not sure where we would be if things turned out differently. After the event, I told my friends your daughter’s story and how she crossed my mind that day. Both of them are very thankful as well. We may have these injuries but were spared our lives, which is greater than any broken legs or ribs. Now, we put distractions away (cellphones, makeup and ect) when getting into a car.

    Of course, I never knew Skylar but I feel as if her story saved us. Her friends and family will always be in prayers.

    Be well,

    Ms. Thankful
    xo

    • God love you – THANK YOU for sharing!!!!

  3. I feel your pain. ❤️ I love that quote by Elizabeth Kubler Ross. When my Mom was alive she “introduced” me to Elizabeth KR by giving me one of her books, this background knowledge was helpful to me last year when I had to plan end of life care for my teenage daughter.

  4. praying for you always.

  5. This is a beautiful memorial to your daughter.

  6. I hesitate to read your writings at work because I know the tears will start flowing so I find a quite place where no one can see and open your blog. It’s been an emotional week for this grandma just thinking that our granddaughter would me celebrating her 19th birthday on March 25th. Not a day goes by that she isn’t on my mind. I look forward to the day when I will see our “lunch lady” in heaven and give her a big hug and kiss! Keep writing and sharing what God lays on your heart. You are a blessing to me as your mom and to all that know you. Mom

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